Your Ego is a Trickster:

How your Ego uses your beliefs to create a false perception of reality.

I like to walk my talk and as I am settling into a new home in Queensland, enjoying the warmth of the sun and slowing down to a point of almost becoming like a stone statute, I’ve had to have a deeper look into my recent lack of desire to grow my business locally. Why has the allure of the view from my balcony really kept me from being fully present in my work, doing what I love in my work and procrastinating like a MOFO?

Did you know your Ego is a trickster? In order to preserve self (Ego, I, me), Ego uses mind games to create and perpetuate beliefs that are nothing more than an illusion based on false perceptions of reality. WOW!

Why does Ego feel like it needs to preserve itself?

Because Ego’s job is to keep us safe (mentally, physically and emotionally). When we are born, we are like the sweet center of an onion. We have no concept of that which can cause us harm. And as we grow and gain an understanding of the world around us, we begin to form layers (beliefs) about how the external world affects our internal world and how to get our internal world’s needs met. Layer upon layer, each new belief builds up over time, formed, re-formed, reinforced, cemented and worn, like a bunch of coats. These layers are informed through our thoughts. If I think it’s true then I will continue to create a mental picture that supports that view (create an illusion) and therefore it becomes true, based on my (perhaps false) perceptions. These perceptions create my reality. So my beliefs create the reality in which we live.

Here’s an example. If I believe that reward only comes to me after hard work (which are the words I heard as a child from my parents and teachers at school), then to be rewarded, make money for example, I will work as hard as I can (hard might be long hours, physically arduous, mentally and/or emotionally exhausting). I will exchange my time energy for money energy in a way that supports the belief that money comes through hard work and unless I work hard or become exhausted Ego (through my belief system) tells me it’s not well earned. Thus, my belief that money only comes after hard work will be validated and perpetuated through hard work. And if I’m already exhausted? To protect me, Ego will tell me that I don’t really need more reward (money), not to do the extra hours required to gain more reward, to give up, it’s just too hard or even worse, don’t even bother to get started in the first place!

So where does the illusion (belief) come from in the first place? From the words we hear as a child. And seeing our parent leave early in the morning and coming home very late at night and another parent who expounds the virtues of a hard-working parent, who was perhaps rewarded for their hard work with reward. And from school where we are told that if we work hard we will be rewarded with good grades, good education and hence a good job. Actually, for me it was working hard to stay present, in body and attentive that would have helped me most! Being “off with the fairies” isn’t a good career choice apparently!! And also from our first jobs. For me working at a fruit shop rotating, restocking and carrying heavy bags of fruit and veg…hard work…in exchange for money.

And this is how our beliefs are formed and become worn like a coat or onion layer. With our perceptions reinforced (beliefs are self-perpetuating remember!!), our inner chatter (Ego) gets on board and creates a perception of reality, i.e. that reward only comes after hard work. Now it’s all good if our beliefs are supporting our growth (such as telling one’s self, “I am healthy, wealthy and wise and money flows easily to me”), but when our Ego chatter declines into beliefs that hold you back, it’s time to reassess. Remember, the subconscious (who drives your bus through actions) doesn’t know if your Ego chatter is true or not, it just accepts it as fact and operates using those rules. And you have the power to change those rules!

Ironically, we usually only stop to ask the important questions, such as why life is so hard? Or why I can’t seem to make enough money to thrive? Or ask when are things going to change for me?, until one of the following happens – We hit a point of exhaustion, illness, disaster, or keep feeling stuck on a merry-go-round.  Just as you hit a period of stalemate between your Heart and Soul’s desires and the unclear but necessary actions necessary to bring those desires forth, you have a choice to make. You can fall on your arse, or maybe into a dark hole or become despondent with life… or you could try something different!

Believe me, when my clients come to me saying they feel stuck, or have lost their mojo, I am not being perverse when I smile and say “that’s fantastic!”. Falling and landing on your arse is actually a good thing in my books! It an opportunity to ask the important questions such as “which belief is holding my reality constant? Where did that belief come from? And is it still true for me?” It’s an opportunity to redefine beliefs, change the mind chatter and start implanting new operating programs into your subconcious.

Life is about movement. Sometimes its backwards (reflection), sometimes it’s sideways (adjustment) and sometimes it’s full steam ahead. Which way are you moving right now? I know for me, now I am more settled in Queensland, it’s time for more growth in all areas of my life so my mind chatter at the moment is  –

“I am excited to bring more creativity into my life through my life’s work” and of course, “Money flows easily with passionate and purposeful activity”.

Love and blessings as always,

Em

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